Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Let your heart be light
From now on,
our troubles will be out of sight

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Make the Yule-tide gay,
From now on,
our troubles will be miles away.

Here we are as in olden days,
Happy golden days of yore.
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Gather near to us once more.

Through the years
We all will be together,
If the Fates allow
Hang a shining star upon the highest bough.
And have yourself

A merry little Christmas now...

Home and away

I'm in my bed now at mom and dad's place. Feeling dizzy and feverish. And I've sneezed so many times that I lost count...buhu.

At least I've bought all Christmas gifts, been to the hair dresser and finished + posted the PM that had to be written... so I can stay in bed tomorrow if that is what has to be done.

Even though it's nice to be home I can't help being so completely jealous of M and F who are spending Christmas and new year's in Guatemala and Mexico.

Got an e-mail from M and she wrote that she and B were about to take a nightbus from Palenque to Merida...And F wrote in her travel journal that she'e taking a volcano tour...

I'm wishing for lovely dreams tonight...dreams that will take me away...

Reminder to me, myself and I

Lars Winnerbäck - Tonight

It's been about 10 years since I saw my first live performance with Lars Winnerbäck in Gothenburg. If I before that wasn't absolutely in love with his music and lyrics I certainly was after that night.

It all started with the song "Med solen i ögonen". The radio morning show at P3 played it at about the same time a few mornings in a row. And the song touched me in the land between asleep and awake. It was impossible to resist his voice and the rhythm and the lyrics.

10 years later I still can't resist him. Even though his two latest albums doesn't touch me as his earlier work does I still enjoy and appreciate them deeply. He got the ability to put the most common and hardest feelings into words and in to magical lyrics...

...jag är en av alla dom som går och tror
att livet ordnas upp med tiden
jag är en av alla dom som kan ge upp
när jag är söndagkvällsförvriden
vad gör man då
jag är en av alla dom som ser nåt svårt
i dessa jämngrå vinterdagar
är du en av alla dom som vill försvinna
när det känns som mörkret klagar
så är vi två
och jag försvinner gärna just inatt

är det mörkret är det stressen är det vintern
är det Stockholm eller livet
jag är en av alla dom som tagit lycka
i sinom tid för givet
sen jag var barn
jag är en av alla dom som varit barn
men sen glömt bort den färdigheten
jag är en av alla dom som skyller sina
sorger på den här planeten
och den här stan
och jag vill vara lite mer för Dig inatt

men ibland så är jag fast
kan du känna likadant
att allt man gör är bara plast
och faktiskt föga intressant

och är jag ensam på en söndag blir jag dum
och mörkrädd mitt på dan
måste bort från tysta rum
och är du hyfsat likadan
kan vi gå vilse genom stan...

-Lars Winnerbäck-

...with some decorations bought at Tiffany's!

No...maybe not at Tiffany's but at Queens, Spitalfield market, London.

OH, HOW I LOVE THAT STORE!!

You could walk around for ever and look at all the pretty stuff covering the walls and ceiling (and almost the floor as well) without even noticing half of the items.

I guess you could call it Tess-heaven!

Look at these beauties:

The Lovely Christmas Tree...

Coffe and banan smoothie...mmmm!

Smoothie of the day includes coffee and we all know that coffee is the students best friend!

3 dl Milk

4 tablespoons Nescafé powder

2 dl vanilla yogurt (the recipe said vanilla ice cream, but I didn't have any at home)

2 bananas

I found the taste a little acridly at the first tasting, so I added some, about 2 tablespoons, sugar and then it got much, much better!

Christmas card making

Å came over tonight for some card making.

So now I'm done with my first 6 Christmas cards this year. I guess more evenings will be devoted to this hobby of mine.

Here's this evenings result:

You just have to love it!

Look at this beauty!!

I just can't resist golden animals...especially not the sparkly ones.

This one followed me home from London (only £ 2.50 at Paperchase).

I could kill for....

...a Starbucks gingerbread latte right now!

I started this study day at 8.30. I'm reading my third article at the moment...and have three more to go before I start with the work for the child and youth course. Around 4 I'm off to the Valla pony club for a field study about children recreational activities and their impact on health.

Tonight I'm finally doing yoga...it's been too long since last time and my body (and mind) needs it.

I feel quite focused at the moment. And I feel like, even if there is a lot (A LOT!) going on at the moment with the thesis and the child/youth course and my energy consuming kitchen fan problem (in double sense), I can handle it! By doing one thing at the time and not allow myself to freak out (okey, okey maybe once in a while won't hurt...might even be good!) I think I will survive this year as well!

Now I'm gonna brew myself a new cup of coffee...and if I try I might be able to pretend it's a lovely gingerbread latte with cream on top!

Friday night smootihe

Studyday with I today. But I've also been on a walk in the sunshine and then I visited the gym for the first time in about 2 weeks. I'm gonna be in so much pain tomorrow...

So now when I've been so good all day I deserve a hot shower and a smoothie in the couch in front of the telly.

Smoothie of the night contains:

(2 portions)

1,5 dl vanilla yoghurt

2 dl orange and bloodgrape juice

2 eggs

2 bananas

Last night of the Proms

Last night on the telly they showed Last night of the Proms from Royal Albert Hall. I absolutely love it, and I always wish I was in the audience waving with a flag and singing to Rule Britannia, God Save the Queen, Land of hope and glory and in the end Auld lang syne...I would even be satisfied with being outside in Hyde Park doing it.

I'll make it happen some day...maybe next year?!

Anyone up for it??

Packing again

Packing for a weekend trip "home" to Halmstad. I have no plans yet, except for a visit at the library where I've got some books to return...1 month too late (Oops).

London last weekend was as lovely as always. A lot of shopping and a lot of catching up with friends.

This week has been confusing and so absolutely boring when it comes to school work...the other day I got so sick of sitting in front of the computer searching for scientific articles I just had to do something creative. What did I do? Well, I ordered all my books and cd-records by colour...

Packing for London

The suitcase is opened and I am suppose to start packing. But the problem is: I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO WEAR!!!

It's always my biggest problem when it comes to travelling. You want to look nice, but still be comfy. You don't want to get to hot nor to cold. AHHH...

Anyway. The exam is done and accordingly to the evaluation in the end I shouldn't be worried.

Tomorrow London!! Have I told you I'm going to London tomorrow?? If not, I tell you now:

I'm going to London tomorrow!!!

Panic me? No never...

Dying?

My right hand is aching from writing little notes on all the different diagnosis and all the related medicines.

My head is spinning and aching because of all the symptoms, the neurotransmitters: dopamine, serotonin, noradrenaline, acetylcholine, GABA, the cytokines: TNF, IL 1, IL 6, IL 19 (who apparently is anti-inflammatory), the side effects of every medicine...and of course the nursing interventions.

Coffee keeps me alive...and the knowledge that London is only 3 and a half day away!

Evening without studying

Tonight I'm not studying!

Had my communication examination this afternoon, and it went fine. But there is always a tension before things like that, and I need to re-focus now.

In about an hour I'm attending the BodyJam class at the gym, despite my aching thigh muscles. After that I need to vacuum-clean the flat and get myself together. I need things to be in their right place to be able to focus 100% on the studying tomorrow.

(This time next week I'm packing for London... Yeay!)

Different ways

It's one of the biggest parts of life. Meeting people, becoming close, becoming friends (sometimes more), sharing good times and bad times. Sometimes it's just for a short while, sometimes it's for longer. Sometimes it might even be forever (but that you'll not know, until forever ends of course).

But as suddenly as someone crosses your way, as suddenly your paths may take different turns again.

It's fascinating, when you think about the effect people might have on your life when entering, and sometimes when leaving. All the things you learn, the new experiences you get and all the new perspectives. All of that makes you grow and think about things differently. It's usually a quite pleasant ride (except for some speed bumps every now and then).

Sometimes you meet again, if separated. Sometimes you don't.

Sometimes you stay in touch, just to hear that all is well (cause that is all you wish for when it come to someone you care about). Sometimes you don't.

No matter what the outcome is, there is always some really good memories to cherish.

Some pumpkin thinking

This is a nice way of decorating pumpkins. I would like to have white pumpkins this year,but I don't think they exist here in Sweden. Or at least not here in Linköping. The orange ones doesn't really go with the colours in my flat...hmm...but I guess I will have to overlook that. (It might be today's biggest "i-lands problem")

Finish each day and be done with it

I hope for no headache tomorrow, and some new energy.

Today wasn't all that good to be honest.

I've done what I've had to do...but not anything more than the absolutely necessary.

But sometimes that has to be enough.

Sunday evening

I love my new lamp from IKEA. Just the colour I've been looking for for ages.

And I love my pretty golden rabbit! He is so kind and very calm. Doesn't make much noise and takes care of himself. The most perfect pet!!

I have brought him inside over the winter. When spring comes again he will be out on the balcony where he likes it the best!

This day has been really nice!

A good ending of this week.

xx

Winter time

Had set the alarm at 8 am this morning...8 am as it was yesterday, so that means I got up at 7 am today. I think it's very nice to have won an extra hour. Started to study at 8. Mom, dad and grandma arrives around 12.30, so I have to get a lot of studying done before that.

Last night was a study night until 8 pm. After that I became a girly-girl, which means I gave myself a body scrub, a facial and a pedicure. Very relaxing and it made me sleep like a baby all night and I actually woke up fresh this morning. Can't remember when that happened last...

Now I'm in the sofa with the computer in my lap and all the books spread around me. I'm soon finished with the chapter about prostatic hyperplasia. Well done me!

Now it's coffee time!!

What you always deserve...

No more Motala!!

Finally...last day in Motala. It felt like this day would never come...but today it came and the working hours are already done and I'm back home again!

Sweeeeeet!

Yesterday I got the first dose of the Swine flue vaccine. Feeling a bit sub febrile at the moment, headache and a diffuse tickling feeling in my body, which is a good thing I guess...means my immune system is working on the protective effect. But unfortunately that means no BodyJam and a night of studying instead!

If it stops rain I might go for a walk...but before that I'm gonna finish of the chapter about affective disorders (could it be more depressing?).

I need coffee and a cinnamon bun. And together with that I would like some sunshine and the leaves to stay on the trees...

Please let there be someone out there able to fix that for me.

(It's not too much to ask right?)

Friendship

London planning with Å tonight!

4 days to fill. So much you can do, but you never have enough time for everything. Shopping, sightseeing, chatting time away over coffee, partying, strolling around...Ohh...

I'm longing so much for this trip...(in case you didn't know already!)

Bathroom dreams

Tonight I wish I had a bathroom like this. If I did, I would light a fire in the fireplace and have a nice warm bath and give me, myself and I some space and pampering.

Communication paper - check!

I'm done! Very effective today...and without chocolate! Amazing!

Tonight scones and "Bonde söker fru" with Å and some friends of hers.

Thanks sweetie for inviting me as well...=)

Have a good night everyone!

xx

Focus

I've got the day off today...or... not off, but I don't have to be in Motala. This afternoon I'm starting to write my 1000 words report on my communication with a patient that I recorded yesterday. So f*cking boring!

I think I might need some chocolate today...

Where are we going?

Favourite

Maria Montazami is my favourite Swedish Hollywood wife, but last night was the final episode...

Today I start 10.30 at the health care centre. Nice with a sleep in for a change.

Something girlie

I'm done studying for today and soon it's gym time again. (I've been really good at going to the gym for some time now. I feel very proud of myself!)

After the gym it's Swedish Hollywood wives on the telly. I wish I was one of them...

It would be so awesome to go around all day, not have to care about money or work, and just look at beautiful things...do some shopping...redecorate the house etc.

Sounds like music to my ears!

And I'm not ashamed to admit it! =)

XX

Bloody study Sunday

Been studying since 9 o'clock this morning. Now it's lunchtime and after I've eaten I'm going to the gym. I need a break.

After that more studying for the rest of the evening I guess.

Yesterday I took the day off. A visit at Vingåker Factory Outlet made me a poor student for the rest of this month. 2 pair of jeans, one scarf and leather gloves...

"...we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl!"

Almost winter

It's cold outside. And I'm not ready for it.
Yesterday when I looked out the window during the morning coffee break there was rain falling down together with big white SNOWFLAKES! Not OK if you ask me.
Two weeks ago I was sitting at my balcony in my bikini, two days ago I had to take ice of the car windows before driving to Motala.
I need to get my coats and boots out from the basement.
But I don't want to...I want to wear strappy sandals!

Tonight its dinner at Å & M's place and then the second Stieg Larsson movie at the cinema.

Other than that I'm longing for London so much I could die...or something...

Dolly wisdom

I want out

I've ended up with a tutor at my clinical placement that's not very keen on being a tutor. So now I'm being tossed around between all the nurses. 5 nurses in 3 days, a bit to much. No one seem to be willing to help me out for more than a few hours...I'm more or less planning my days alone, a few hours at a time. It's frustrating, but it's getting easier...to bad it has taking me almost a week to figure things out. Would have been much easier with some help...

I don't want to do this anymore....I want out.

Things I would like to wear this winter

...and you never know...
London is, sooner than later, just around the corner!

Autumn sky

New neighbours

My neighbour just popped in to ask a question about the tumble drier. Fair enough. Nothing weird about that.
Then she said that she was about to sublet her apartment to a friend, who just got divorced, until he found a new place of his own. Fair enough. Nothing weird about that.
Then she said: So I thought I'd give you my number in case it gets a bit loud and messy.
I don't like that, something is a bit weird about that...

She was staying with her man/boyfriend in the meantime, since she stays at his place most of the time anyway...they have separate apartments for economical reasons only, she explained. That's a bit weird as well...

I wish I wasn't so prejudicious.

Psychosis and I

I'm at the psychosis surgery this week.
It's really interesting...but not for me in the long run. I really don't want to know about all the weirdos out there. To be honest I'm a bit scared of them...even though I know I shouldn't be.
But I do also feel so, so sorry for them at the same time. Schizophrenia is an awful disease with so much suffering involved.

Today I saw the worst misery I've ever seen...or to be more correct I smelled the worst misery I've ever smelled.

My tutor asked me if I wanted to give the injection...but I declined with my hand holding my nose...and trying not to touch anything.

Bubbles

Sunshine everybody, sunshine!!

I'm still in front of my books, but I'm running out of inspiration. At least the weather has been absolutely gorgeous today, so I've been sitting out on the balcony reading all afternoon. Did you know that above the 60th degree of latitude (~ the same latitude as Stockholm) you will not be able to produce any vitamin D in the skin from the sun after the autumnal equinox (next week!)? One of the factors that we have a high prevalence of osteoporosis in this country. So out in the sun everybody...we need vitamin D to activate the osteoblasts who rebuild the bones and to increase the calcium absorption in the intestine. We don't want to get a hip fracture, do we!?

Ah, well...I might be on the safe side so far...even though I'm almost past the age for the "peak-bone-mass". A step/strength class at the gym around lunch time was good prevention for upcoming age-related bone mass loss.

Tonight Sis and E arrives for a weekend visit. Lovely!

xx

Lovely autumn weather and a walk with a friend

After a long day studying on the balcony in the lovely sunny autumn weather I've now eaten and feel very content. Didn't go to the gym today since I still have muscle pain from Saturday's class...but tomorrow it's Yoga-time again. Yeay!

When I logged on to Facebook earlier I read that S, a friend from the first semester here in Linköping who later dropped out, is in town for tonight only so now we're meeting up for a walk. Really looking forward to see her!

Lilies

Bought new lilies today on the farmers market. Only 20 kr each. Very nice!

Good start

Started the day with BodyPump at the gym. Lovely but hard. Had my second good work out week in a row, 4 times at the gym and two long walks. I hope this flow continues cause it's so liberating to leave the books and the computer behind for an hour or two.

Yoga was a big positive surprise last Sunday. Absolutely heavenly for the body! Attended my second class on Tuesday and I've already bought my own Yoga mat. My plan is to do it al least once a week. The good thing is that the class is on Sundays and late at Tuesdays which is good even when I commute to Motala for my clinical placement.

¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤

I was thinking about studying a bit today as well, but right now I'm not sure I can be bothered. I feel like doing something creative...or maybe baking some bread...

Power yoga

The Benefits of Power Yoga

• Low-impact workout for the whole body
• Builds strength, flexibility and stamina
• Realigns the spine, strengthens bones and joints, lengthens muscles
• Improves blood circulation and respiration, boosting energy levels
• Detoxifies the body, purifying the internal organs
• Calms the mind and soothes the emotions, removing anxiety
• Brings focus and clarity to the mind

At least that is what people say, so I'm giving it a try tonight.
Hopefully I enjoy it!

Summer meets autumn

Some new autumn flowers and plants on my balcony. I love the purple and green colour of the Heathers and the decorating cabbage.

I don't know for how much longer I can have my Hibiscus outside. Right now it seems to enjoy the weather; two beautiful flowers and 4 buds, but it might be too cold soon.

The sight of it makes you happy, don't you think?!

Audrey Hepburn wisdom

It's getting worse

Had an awful night coughing. Went trough every part of the flat like a drug addict after some cough medicine to ease my misery. But I had non. Fell asleep around 4 am, exhausted.

I pity my fellow-travellers on the train towards Halmstad tonight.

Summer holiday begins

I'm done working! Last shift tonight and that was very well timed since I have a cold and my voice is almost completely gone.

It is so annoying not being able to speak properly. When you lose your voice you realize how big part of life it really is to be able to communicate with your voice. I know I'm supposed to be quiet and not even whisper to make it better...but it is sooooo HARD! There is always something I want, or need, to say.

Tomorrow my summer holiday begins. Lets hope for some sunshine. Yesterday at Berg's locks was lovely and warm. I need more days like that!

What I think

Loveliness

Absolutely perfect!

If

If I, by some reason, would end up without my ability to move my arms and legs and head. If I cannot longer communicate my will and if I lose my ability to take in food or drinks by mouth and swallow my saliva take me to Switzerland and give it an end.


Life can be so cruel. And it's hard to watch , work with and help these people. It breaks my heart. You do the best you can, but you still can't see on the patient if they are pleased with the turning to the other side, if they are hot or cold, or if they have pain. You just look in to their eyes, and maybe you can see some pain and sorrow...somewhere... But you just aren't sure.


I would not like to live like that. Other people might...but if it would ever come to be about me, and keeping me alive like that it would be against my deepest will.

A true royalist

Watched the birthday celebration of our crown princess Viktoria on television earlier. And thank God that Daniel was finally allowed to celebrate with her!

Me, on the other hand, is still waiting for prince William to ditch Kate and make me the Queen of England!

Until it happens you'll find me at work...or at least during the next upcoming 4 weeks.

Packing the car

Soon time to leave Halmstad...but before that we are looking at a summer house in Haverdal.

Wednesday night in July

When you know that Halmstad, and the view over Tylön, can be as beautiful as on the picture a ordinary Wednesday night in July, you can't stop wondering what the hell you are doing in Linköping?!

Song of the day - One night only

I love this song. There is always time for some dancing while packing for a week in Halmstad.

Late Saturday night wisdom

Days off

I spent Tuesday at the beach Varamon in Motala. Lake Vättern was awfully cold (only 17 degrees). But it was very nice and relaxing anyway. If it gets warm when I'm back working in Linköping next time I'm definitely going back.

Now I've got 10 days off and I'm going to visit Å and her family in their summer house tonight, staying until Saturday. On Sunday I'm going back to Halmstad.