Audrey Hepburn wisdom

It's getting worse

Had an awful night coughing. Went trough every part of the flat like a drug addict after some cough medicine to ease my misery. But I had non. Fell asleep around 4 am, exhausted.

I pity my fellow-travellers on the train towards Halmstad tonight.

Summer holiday begins

I'm done working! Last shift tonight and that was very well timed since I have a cold and my voice is almost completely gone.

It is so annoying not being able to speak properly. When you lose your voice you realize how big part of life it really is to be able to communicate with your voice. I know I'm supposed to be quiet and not even whisper to make it better...but it is sooooo HARD! There is always something I want, or need, to say.

Tomorrow my summer holiday begins. Lets hope for some sunshine. Yesterday at Berg's locks was lovely and warm. I need more days like that!

What I think

Loveliness

Absolutely perfect!

If

If I, by some reason, would end up without my ability to move my arms and legs and head. If I cannot longer communicate my will and if I lose my ability to take in food or drinks by mouth and swallow my saliva take me to Switzerland and give it an end.


Life can be so cruel. And it's hard to watch , work with and help these people. It breaks my heart. You do the best you can, but you still can't see on the patient if they are pleased with the turning to the other side, if they are hot or cold, or if they have pain. You just look in to their eyes, and maybe you can see some pain and sorrow...somewhere... But you just aren't sure.


I would not like to live like that. Other people might...but if it would ever come to be about me, and keeping me alive like that it would be against my deepest will.

A true royalist

Watched the birthday celebration of our crown princess Viktoria on television earlier. And thank God that Daniel was finally allowed to celebrate with her!

Me, on the other hand, is still waiting for prince William to ditch Kate and make me the Queen of England!

Until it happens you'll find me at work...or at least during the next upcoming 4 weeks.

Packing the car

Soon time to leave Halmstad...but before that we are looking at a summer house in Haverdal.

Wednesday night in July

When you know that Halmstad, and the view over Tylön, can be as beautiful as on the picture a ordinary Wednesday night in July, you can't stop wondering what the hell you are doing in Linköping?!

Song of the day - One night only

I love this song. There is always time for some dancing while packing for a week in Halmstad.

Late Saturday night wisdom

Days off

I spent Tuesday at the beach Varamon in Motala. Lake Vättern was awfully cold (only 17 degrees). But it was very nice and relaxing anyway. If it gets warm when I'm back working in Linköping next time I'm definitely going back.

Now I've got 10 days off and I'm going to visit Å and her family in their summer house tonight, staying until Saturday. On Sunday I'm going back to Halmstad.

Heat

It's hot outside...it's hot inside. But I'm not gonna complain. I like it, even though I've been working the whole weekend. A very calm weekend at work. A bit too calm actually...almost a bit boring in between.

I just got in from the park. Finished at 2.30 this afternoon and got two lovely hours in the sun. But I have to say I do miss Halmstad a lot right now. It would have been nice to be able to go to the beach instead of the park next to the cemetery. I hope this sunny weather will last next week as well since I have 10 days off as from Friday. The first three I will spend with Å in their summer house and in Linköping. Sunday night I arrive on the west coast.

Song of the day - Dirty Diana

Even though I'm not a big Michael Jackson fan I have a few favourite songs. This is one of them.

Excuse me??!! (Part 1)

Scenario 1
Me in the kitchen at work that we share with an other care unit.
I had just put some dishes in the dishwasher but hadn't turned it on because I had some more things to collect and I didn't consider it full yet. In the kitchen was also one staff from the other unit plus two trolleys when an other work member (older lady) from the other unit as well came in. Since I wasn't using my trolley and it was a bit crowded I decided to place it outside the room before I finished what I was doing.

When I was just in front of the fridge with the trolley, with my back facing the two others the older lady said to the younger guy in a really snorty voice:
- I don't like when they leave us to take care of their dishes. This is not who we do in around here, we had some things in the machine first. And if you fill it you will have to turn it on.
Me who gets really annoyed when people talk about me like I'm not there when I'm still in the room turned around and put my most ironical nice voice on and said:
- It might be me you're talking about. I've been told that we share this kitchen and I'm not done filling the machine, I've got some more things to collect. But If I've done some thing wrong I'm really sorry and can you please show me how to do it your way cause this is my first day and apparently I have lots of things to learn.

She started to excuse herself while I took out an other basket and replaced my dirty dishes in that and then I left room.

An hour later I ran in to her in the kitchen again and she said:
- I hope you didn't get angry with me before, in a very officious voice.
I smiled a very fake smile and said:
- Of course not!

I'm glad she felt a bit guilty. And I'm glad I didn't loose my temper...but I'll tell you, it was really close!

Balcony vs. garden

It's not that I don't like my balcony. In fact I love it and could probably not live without it but...(there is always a but)...today I wish I had a garden like the one on the picture. My balcony is way too hot at the moment and I want to be outside. A garden with some shade would be lovely.

All I can do is dream...at least that is something I'm good at.

It's time for me to clean up around here and then I'm off to the gym. It's good for me, this feeling bored and lonely in Linköping...gives me time to get ready for beach 2009.

In need of my beauty sleep

It was a great midsummer weekend in Halmstad. But I'm too tired to write about it today. I need my beauty sleep...so my very interesting writing will have to wait until tomorrow.

See you soon...Good night! X

Happy Midsummer!

View over lake Vättern and Visingsö from Brahehus

"...De fagra blomsterängar och åkerns ädla säd, de rika örtesängar och lundens gröna träd, de skola oss påminna Guds godhets rikedom, att vi den nåd besinna som räcker året om."

Sweden is quite beautiful at the moment with all the green trees and flowers...at least when the sun is shining from blue skies.

It's been a busy week. Early mornings and a lot of new impressions and information to take in at work. On two of the evenings I've been sightseeing a bit in the area around Linköping with J since I've borrowed mom's car this week. This has resulteted in that I've been absolutley knackered at night. But it's been worth it.
Monday afternoon/evening we drove to Söderköping to eat ice-cream and yesterday we took the car to Vadstena to take a look at the castle and convent/monatery and ate barbeque buffé. Two pretty little towns.

Söderköping and Ice-cream, Saffron-flavour is my new favourite!

Vadstena castle and the moat outflow to lake Vättern.


Barbecue buffé. ME LIKE!!!

Tomorrow I'm driving home to Halmstad to celebrate midsummer with friends. One whole and two half days at home, intens and busy as always...Hopefully I will get some rest as well. Next week is busy busy busy...and I need to be at my best.

Happy Midsummer!!!

Back in Sweden

Got back to Sweden Monday night again after a lovely weekend in the loveliest city of them all! Good friends, good shopping, not the worst weather (even some sunshine!), good food...everything was good, as always!
I can't help it but I love the mix between scruffy, old, new and perfect! It gives me so much energy and inspiration.
Sometimes Sweden is too organized, perfect and cute. Of course, I do appreciate that as well...but it is good with variation sometimes otherwise it's easy to g et stuck in old patterns.

Tuesday I spent half day i n Stockholm and had a nice sushi-lunch with my favourite: Mr. P!

I love the way the people who owns that balcony really tried to make it beautiful...

Now I'm back in Linköping and got a bit of the coming home blues...

London live

Old Spitafield market is on the schedule today. And of course my favourite store Caravan!

Yesterday we (me, sis and W) did Kings Road and then we (me, sis, W, C and S) had a nice dinner in Marylebone.

All is well. I might not be coming back home...x

London baby!

Tess and sis + Friday night, Saturday, Sunday and Monday = London!

Stainless steel

I've always said that stainless steel won't, under any circumstances, be a part of my future kitchen. But this picture makes me a bit more open to the possibility...A very good compromise between soft pink and hard steel.


I decided not to go to the course evaluation today. If they want my opinion they can read one of my 4 (or is it 5) completed evaluation forms. And hopefully they have been listening to me during the 10 verbal evaluations they've made me do this semester. It was nice with a sleep-in, and I believe I deserved it. Soon I'm off to the city centre. Need to pay my bank a visit and buy light bulbs and new black tights. But most importantly today I'm going to the city library to vote in the European parliament election since I'm not in the country on Sunday.

A never ending lovestory

October/November 1997. Our first meeting. I was young but it was still love at first sight.

After three years we met again, thanks to my sister. We met a lot during the following two years. I tried to visit as often as I could. We became friends, it was impossible to be more than that, so far apart and me still being young. But every time I left I knew I wanted more...

September 2005. I decided to give it a chance, give us a chance. At a venture I moved in. Three months became 10 months. It was not easy, sometimes it was hard and turbulent. But in spite of everything it was beautiful. The most caring and loving relationship. And I learned that love can never be anything but beautiful.

When June 2006 came I had to leave. I tried to explain, mostly to myself, that nothing can last forever...We decided to stay friends. Good friends. The best friends.

I got back in late December that same year. But things didn't go our way...and we got split apart again. It felt sad and so final back then, like it was over for good this time. But now I know that nothing can break us apart, what we have will always be...

We haven't met for quiet some time now. It's been 1 year and 5 months to be exact. But Friday this week it's time...finally we'll meet again!

Status

General condition: Happy r/t passing the big exam a few weeks ago.

Activity: Been working between 13.30-21.30, walked 6363 steps during that time.

Skin: Reddish-brown r/t 5 1/2 h in the sun yesterday.

Nutrition: Just ate 400 g milk chocolate r/t reward for being good.

Elimination: Need of taking a leak r/t way too much coffee at work.

Sunshine

I've just done my last exam for this semester!
Wonderful.
There is a lecture between 10.15 and 12...but me and I decided not to go. It's not about something important anyway and the sun is shining!! 20 degrees in the shade already.

You'll find me on a blanket in Trädgårdsföreningen...

Sommar

"En vänlig grönskas rika dräkt

har smyckat dal och ängar.
Nu smeker vindens ljumma fläkt
de fagra örtesängar.
Och solens ljus och lundens sus och vågens sorl bland viden
förkunna sommartiden.

Sin lycka och sin sommarro
de yra fåglar prisa.
Ur skogens snår,
ur stilla bo framklingar deras visa.
En hymn går opp av fröjd och hopp från deras glada kväden,
från blommorna och träden."
Carl David af Wirsén

My latest interior decorating purchase

I bought this old educational poster in my favourite store "Kult & co", that my former wood craft teacher owns, on my last visit in Halmstad. I had been thinking about buying it for quite some time and finally decided to do it. And I am so glad I did...I love it, and it makes me happy every time I look at it! The colours goes perfectly with the rest of my combined living-/bedroom. The coffetable and the lamp is bought in that store as well...They might have been too expensive for a student like me...but who cares? When I look at these things I feel at home, I feel love and I feel that this is me! A bit nerdy?! Yes indeed! :)

I am sure...

Hang in there darling!

First day

My first day at the new job is over. And there was, of course, nothing to be nervous about...Nice and friendly staff, and my classmate S had her 4th introduction day today as well. It's always nice to have a familiar face in unknown territory...=)

I'm working again tomorrow morning, then Friday night and Saturday morning. Thinking about it yesterday felt kind of hard, but today I'm glad. It's good with a change.Working make sense...studying doesn't....to be honest I can't stand anything that has something to do with school at the moment. So tonight I'm gonna finish an assignment and then I'm not thinking about school for the rest of the weekend!!

Now, if it doesn't rain, I'm taking a walk in the forest...the gym will have to wait until tomorrow. I've actually been good at this gym-thing the last couple of days...Step on Sunday and Afro and Core on Monday. Well done me!!!

Summer job begins..

Tomorrow morning I'm doing my first introduction shift at my summer job in the neurosurgeon care unit at the hospital. A bit nervous to be honest. I don't like being the newbie...

Now sleep...Wish me luck.

Time out

1. Why am I doing this?
2. What's the use of doing it?
3. Is it worth it?

I don't really feel regrets about doing this, but I do feel regrets about not doing the things I didn't chose. Tricky...

Song of the day - Not ready to make nice

Pep talk

Things might be oh so frustrating right now...but there is nothing to do about it. Focus focus focus. Do not explode, do not scream. Keep cool, take a deep breath, just smile, smile, smile (fake it till you make it)...

Song of the day - Fairytale

Different and charming. I like it! Extra plus for the amazing dancers.

Saturday

Tonight I'm watching Eurovision song contest even though I've lost a bit of interest in that competition in the last couple of years.
After wathcing the semi-final when Marlena got to final I actually got more excited reading about Måns Zelmerlöw playing Chicago, the musical, in London later this year.

Post exam

They will probably never stop surprising me...Some of the questions where so weird it's almost scary!!
For once in my life I am glad that I am a woman who have had a yeast infection...might have saved me this time...Time will tell!

Status

Pain: Headache r/t no glasses while studying and my ventilation/kitchen fan/electricity bill problem. VAS 4. Intervention: Analgesics

Nutrition: Pre-exam cravings for chocolate. At the moment hungry, but too tired to cook, have an almost empty fridge and no money. Risk for malnutrition.

If I could make a wish....

...then I would wish that I could go to an Elvis concert...

House cleaning

Effectiveness and creativity

I came to me at 8:15 this morning to study...and she just left. We got a lot of things done and it felt very efficient. Four days left to this semesters big exam...and I try to persuade myself that I have things under control and that I feel no stress...but my poor heart has start to beat irregularly again, not as bad as last time...My strategy for this stress related problem is that I will continue to pretend everything is cool...you know: Fake it, till you make it!

As always when it comes to serious studying I get all creative and with a million ideas (that unfortunately don't have anything to do with appendicitis, antibiotic treatment, Crohn's disease or cholesystitis). Not really a good thing when there is no time to act on these ideas. Instead I feed myself with some inspiring pictures and dream myself away...hoping that my creativity will last...

Utekravall

I don't like rain...especially not on a night when you are suppose to be outside and tonight it is Utekravallen.





<---- I have my wellies on!




Have to go...bye bye! xx

Hilarious

Song of the day - Är det här platsen

Peter Jöback and Eva Dahlgren

"...Är det här året då allting vänder? Steg för steg en dag i sänder..."

Something beautiful...

Evaluations and day dreaming...

Today I've done my last two evaluations of my clinical placement period. All together I've done 8 different (but still almost the same) about my 7 week placement period. Amazing. It might be a good idea for the University to coordinate things like this in some way...it would save us all a lot of work and most importantly a lot of TIME...and we all know time is precious... and time is money...

Speaking of money...did you know that you could buy this castle in Ukraine for only 1.8 million USD...

I need to stop day dreaming...and finish my studying for tonight...

Quote of the day

"I don't want to make money. I just want to be wonderful." -Marilyn Monroe

Lovely days and all grown up

I've had two wonderful days and nights. Lovely old friends and new acquaintances, sunshine from a blue sky, barbecue and rosé wine...mmm, sometimes life's really good.
Now I've had my fun for a week...tomorrow and Sunday will be devoted to studying.

I'm so tired right now...but had two cups of coffee at Å's place tonight so I probably won't be able to fall asleep. Caffeine affects me so much sometimes it's scary.
At the dinner at Å's place tonight I also ate onion, and did actually like it...MY GOD what is happening to me?????!!! (It might have been a ones in a lifetime thing so try not to get too excited ok?!)
It must be the fact that I'm 25 now and all (?!) grown up...

Last day in april

Time flies...it's already the the last day of April. My God...where did this month go?!

On the schedule for this "Valborgsmässoafton" is picnic and barbecue in the park with Å and some other friends of hers. The sun is shining just as it has been for the last two weeks, but it's a bit windy. I'm soon off to Systembolaget to buy some wine...

Yesterday I bought a new bikini and a skirt...The bikini I kind of needed but the skirt was just pretty and on sale...bad bad me...I need to save some shopping for London...

Back in school

Had class in school today. A bit weird, since it's about 7 weeks since last time, but nice to actually see some of the other students...

Now it's time for a walk with Å and maybe some ice-cream...yummy!

Pictures from Saturday on the beach

Song of the day - Som jag hade dig förut

Going back...

Helgen är över. Molnen har dragit sig in över Halmstad och jag får den där melankoliska känsla man får när sommaren börjar lida mot sitt slut...trots att sommaren inte ens har börjat på riktigt.

Går dagen bjöd på årets första dopp i havet. Det var varmt på stranden, när man låg i lä och kallt i vattnet. Men jag och F hade ju pratat om det redan kvällen innan så det var ju bara att ta tjuren vid hornen och traska i plurret. L förevigade det hela med kameran från säkert avstånd i strandkanten.

Kvällen bjöd på restaurangbesök med kära M och sedan en sväng till Morfars för att sedan avsluta på Mårtensson. En bra kväll överlag...mycket folk jag inte sett på länge. Memory lane var vackert igår!

Snart går bussen...

Halmstad

A weekend in Halmstad. The forecast predicts 18 degrees C and sun tomrrow, a few degrees cooler today, but sun as well! How lovely isn't that??!

Outside studying is on the schedule today...just because I'm in Halmstad doesn't mean I'm study free unfortunately.

Oh...I wish I could stay longer!!

In about a year I might be moving back...at least that's my plan. But you never know what the future bring.

All I know is that some of the most lovely people live here...and I miss them when I'm away!

Now breakfast on the balcony... xx

Luxury studying

Tonight I just had to do something to make the studying a bit more fun.

There was a little left of the sparkling Rosé wine from Saturday night and some dark chocolate with raspberries...Delicious...
Now it's time for bed and I only have 250 more words to write. That's tomorrow's project.

Good ending of a nice weekend, with nice company and nice, sunny, warm weather! Tell you more about this Easter weekend tomorrow...

Lunch at the balcony

Todays checklist

Sore throat: 1
Runny nose: 1
Fever: > 37,5 C
Body weight in kilos: 60 (Not OK! What the fuck happened?!)
Conversations with stupid teacher: 1
Things to do: 10 000 000
Motivation: - 5
London vacations booked: 1 (Thank God and sis!)

25 years old....oh my GOD!

More musicals to the people!!

Wednesday afternoon wisdom

The most beautiful bag in the world

Birthday gift to me from myself??? Well, yes maybe...
...Accessorize here I come!!!

Tired

13 hours of sleep...and I'm still tired. I've tried to study all day...but I've nodded at at least one time on every page.
It might be because of the fact that I'm tired after the Berlin trip...It might be because my brain and I is over stressed about the upcoming 4, 5, 6 weeks...it might be because of the weather (snow again...)

Berlin

I'm soon off to the airport. Being picked up at 4 am. The flight to Berlin is due at 6.30. Early start.
In Berlin we (me and I and some others from Uni) will attend an International forum for quality and safety in health care.

I'm excited, even tough there is something putting a shadow over it right now.

See you Saturday again.

Bad result

Oh! Fuck wank bugger shitting arse head and hole!

(I borrow this quote from Billy Mac in Love Actually tonight...kind of fits right now)

Baby dry your eyes - day

Today the sun is shining!!!

• I had an interview for a summer job at the hospital at 10 am.
  
• I had my new spring shoes on.

There is hope for changes!

On my way to the hospital, with the sun warming my face I got true spring feelings. And I got to think of Marit Bergman's album Baby dry your eyes. One of my favourite albums.

Spring and Marit Bergman goes hand in hand and it makes me think of that spring I spent in London. I listened to that album almost everyday in my CD-player on my way to work. I can still remember where I was walking to each particular song:

The intro played on my way down the elevator, I turned at the Café Nero corner in the beginning of Tomorrow is today, and when Let's just fall in love was playing I was usually somewhere around the Serpentine in Hyde Park.

I wish I could meet the spring in London...

Sunset over Hyde park

Song of the day - You're my world

A real feel-good song with Emilia from last nights Melodiefestival.